Corporal
Punishment –A case of condoning violence or Spare the Rod Spoil the child 嚴父出孝子，慈母多敗兒, 不打真的不成器吗？
Most of you
would have recalled the case of a Malaysian couple posted to Sweden who were
charged and convicted under Swedish law of gross violation of children’s
integrity. Their method of discipline –canning, would have been the norm in
many Asian countries but deemed to be a criminal act in most Western countries.
This is a
topical issue in Malaysia as we consider
our laws to align with the Convention on the Rights of the Child . The Star in
Page 16 ( 27 /01/2015) with a sub headline-Parents in Chinese schools Okay with
caning . I must confess this is one of the most divisive issues even in my own
household !! The phrase Spare the Rod , Spoil the child has a biblical root “He
who spares the rod hates his son, but he who loves him is careful to discipline
him” . There are many phrases of
similar meaning in different languages 不打不成器, 棍棒底下出孝子, which show a universal acceptance
of corporal punishment in many cultures but why has it been outlawed now ?
In the context of child discipline
, corporal punishment (not amounting to
causing injury) was acceptable and it is still acceptable in Malaysia because of the domestic nature of the act , a
case of what a family does within the confine of four walls is a private matter
.
We accept that children have fewer
“rights “ because they are not fully responsible for their own acts and if not
checked /disciplined , parents will ultimately bear the responsibility . The
discussion now is –what is an appropriate form of punishment ? If it is not
acceptable to verbally assault /insult an adult, why is it acceptable for an adult to humiliate a defenseless child
? Punishment of any form is meant to act
as a deterrent ; so a quick slap on the hand of a 3 year old child touching a
hot kettle may send an instant message
of “touch means pain “ but will the same message work for a 7 year old
who fails to hand in his homework because he did not know how to complete it? Does
removing the ability to inflict pain mean
taking away the ultimate tool for parents and teachers to instill fear
when fear is the only language they understand ?
As I
mentioned earlier, this is a controversial parenting subject with no clear cut
answers . Every child is different and every family has a unique set of
circumstances .
We are doing a survey on corporal punishment
in schools and at homes so we can gauge the parents response and come to a common understanding
on the acceptable forms of punishment .
While this survey is not scientific , it reflects the views of those who chose
to respond. When we have many taking part (200 or more ) , it is fairly
representative of the views of the parents in Subang Jaya with children in SJKC.
You can also submit your comments but please be reminded of the common
etiquettes of posting –no offensive remarks directed at any individuals and
respect others’ views even if you disagree with them.
*** Irrespective of whether you support, against or like to put forward alternatives, we invite you to comment and take part in our survey. - Web version only: if you are using mobile version scroll to the bottom and change to web version to vote)
(answer polls: top right of this page (for mobile: scroll to bottom of page and click web version to vote) , add comments at bottom of this post)****
Happy
Parenting
Ken Koo
3 comments:
when we have to resort to physical punishment to serve as a deterrent , what do we aim to achieve ? Our current society frequently exhibits a strong arm mentally of using physical threats or violence to settle a disagreement as opposed to using logical reasoning . The loudest voice often wins the day leaving a sizeable minority in a state of extreme unhappiness. The wide spread use of corporal punishment against minors is in many respects reflect our society's acceptance of using violence or the threat of physical harm as legitimate methods of settling our differences . Rule by intimidation, rent a mob, play to the crowd .....we only have ourselves to blame.
I received letters from parents:
One parent wrote: "It is encouraged that teachers shall communicate with parents finding the truth why a child is not submitting homework/behaving abnormally before the canning takes place at school. This is to ensure the punishment is carried out rightfully, not to instill fear in students's mind afraid of going to school.
There are many reason why a child is not submitting homework/behaving abnormally, for example, parents absence to guide them at home, lack of comprehensive ability in kids, family challenges and etc.
Two-way communication between parents and teacher is the key in bringing up students' interest in learning and loving school."
another mother wrote: "No, no one should use corporal punishment as it will not only cause injury
to the kids physical but also mental. Kids will be in fear and dare not
speak out for themselve. They will be scare to go to school and lost
interest in studies."
What is the MOE's guideline on corporal punishment, can any teacher uses cane to punish students on just little issue such as did not draw lines in exercise book, forgot to bring book, forgot to do homework, etc.?
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